By Susan Castelhano

Do you believe in fairytales?  Perhaps I should ask if you believe in the fairy godmother, or the beautiful princess waiting to be swept off her feet by the handsome prince charming.  From the days of our early childhood we are fed misleading stories about evil stepmothers, and big bad wolves.  As children we never question these fantasies; we grow up wanting to be princesses, and when in need we believe that a fairy godmother will come to our aid.  Fairy tales are a state of mind and not reality.

We carry this childhood belief into our adulthood.  We look for the prince charming, or the perfect job, the perfect house, and so on.  These are personal fairy tales, which are pure fantasies.  They are what you want to believe in.  These fairy tales or fantasies turns us into self-absorbed narcissist with thoughts of improbable events that could lead to a happy fairytale ending, but usually do not.

Many of us have become victims of fairy tales due to fear and ignorance that we ourselves have created in our own minds.  A fairytale stereotype easily falls prey to preferences, opinions, likes, dislikes, and prejudices.

 We must free ourselves from this unrealistic way of thinking.   Instead of searching for the perfect job, the perfect mate, the perfect friend, the perfect home we should firstly look around us, and look at what we have and find the good in it.  It seems we are never thankful with what we have, but are always fantasizing about the unreal.  It seems that we are always dissatisfied with ourselves and everything around us.

We must look at who we really are; have a positive relationship with ourselves as a person.  Just by being ourselves and not imitating others, or trying not to be anything else but ourselves, we will be able to obtain more direction in finding our ‘path.’  Whenever in doubt as to who we are or where we are going, the question, ‘who is the captain of our ship?’ should be asked. We are the owners of our lives, so WE are in command of our ship.

Many of us fail to fully live our lives for fear and ignorance of the unknown.  For this very reason days, months, and years go by quickly without our having taken part in our present moments by doing useful things, which result in future happenings.  Life is pretty much like an on-going movie – one scene after another – a sequence of events that are related.

For us not to become victims of fairy tales, we must put our fears and fantasies to the side, and address things worth pursuing which will enhance our lives.  The first step is to stop and count our blessings, as they say: look around and see the things that we are thankful for.  Soon we can find that what we do have is what we had desired in the first place; we just had to put it into the right perspective.  From that point on we can progress into the future.